~*~ Nerveracking Personal Stress Test ~*~

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“We’re in a free fall into the future.  We don’t know where we’re going.  Things are changing so fast, and always when you’re going through a long tunnel, anxiety comes along.  And all you have to do to transform your hell into a paradise is to turn your fall into a voluntary act.  It’s a very interesting shift of perspective and that’s all it is… joyful participation in the sorrows and everything changes.” 

~ Joseph Campbell, Mythologist ~

Hello, my friends…  Hope this post finds you well and ready to face the week ahead.

Yesterday, I was enjoying a fun-filled morning of blogging and reading, that was right up until the time I realized it was mid-afternoon and still hadn’t attacked my cleaning goals.  What I thought would only be a break from reading and posting turned into a war against cleaning and organizing my personal affairs (personal paperwork) in order to begin the process of filling out the application online for the NJ Family Act for the Aged, Blind, and Disabled (ABD).

I ended up never returning to blogging and posting yesterday because sitting upright hurt my back in more ways than one.  So, after I was done with my cleaning, I took a much-needed shower, ate a little something, and laid in bed and watched “Versailles” on Netflix until I drifted off to sleep.  Good news…  No whacky, vivid dreams of a raging alcoholic of the past!

This morning, I woke up a little on the later side, posted the two things I normally post at or around midnight the night before and started the application for the (ABD).  This particular application is to obtain the much-required health insurance that I so desperately need.

Let me tell you something, this application has already stressed me out in such a way, I ended up saving the progress on it and stepped away to regain composure.  As in the quote above, I actually felt as if I was in a free fall and my anxiety was starting to grasp its ugly grip on me.  A break from it was truly needed.  At sometime later, perhaps… I will attempt to conquer the remaining application.  Maybe.

Tomorrow, I have full intentions of visiting Somerset Counties Social Services Office to have them provide me with this “So-called notice of termination of benefits” that they claimed to have mailed to me, and lie about me denying the rights to further Medicaid benefits.  

Because of my extra work yesterday in making sure all my “ducks were in a row”, my documentation is beyond ready to fight this discrepancy.  So, for the most part, I won’t be here for most of the day.  Social Services system is as antiquated as time gone by.  Nothing in that office is ever an easy process.  I have to put on an act and smile between gritted teeth to someone that I’m almost positively sure is still going to lie to my face.  However, I am prepared and ready for battle in the most diplomatic fashion I can muster.

I never usually request this, but I’m going to this time around.  Would you all mind say a little prayer for me this evening as I go into battle with the said system of my obtaining my health benefits back?  I would so greatly appreciate it with all my heart.  Thank you, so very much in advance!

In the meantime, I am going to read some post for a while in order to calm my shaken nerves.

Take Care & God Bless,







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